Wednesday, January 02, 2008

Another year

I got to go out this New Year's Eve, as my mum babysat for me. So I went round to M's pub. It feels weird being not-quite-landlady. The benefits of having a house independent of the job are huge, but on the downside it means we don't see all that much of each other and I'm not as involved with the pub as I have been. I don't even know the till properly.

The regulars are curious about me and were very friendly. I don't get there much in the evenings, you see, so while day-time clientele have viewed me extensively, I am an enigma wrapped in a ... well, I can't be arsed to continue with that one, but you get my point. I felt on show, like a goldfish, glop glop glop, and having been out of it in the last couple of years, it was quite difficult to remember how to be mine host. I'm always happier behind the bar anyway, but M had it well-staffed and wanted me to have a "good time". A good time would be working it. Still the staff would've been pissed off if any of them had lost double-time hours had I worked, I suppose.

I was also fielding a rather over-familiar fellow's advances. Unfortunately he's one of the "crowd" and it was "all in good fun", "just messing" and "him being him".

This meant kneeing him in the bollocks wasn't an option. Sadly.

I have a knack for balls-cutting remarks, but I held that in check because I don't know them all well enough to know whether it would go in my favour and they'd laugh at him, or be all aghast at me. After all, it's in good fun that he's pressing up against me, has a bit of a case of octopus-hands and is offering to snort cocaine from my bosom. Lucky me.

I like a bit of male interest on occasion but too much of anything is too much, (that's what too much means!) I'm really out of practice with managing drunken bums, which makes me quite cross with myself. And M was expecting me to handle myself as usual, so he wasn't much help. Oh well.


Anonymous said...

I wouldn't have fancied that much! Sounds a bit stressful. Couldn't M have manfully punched him in the mouth or somesuch? Isn't that what men are for? (Oooh, sound of feminists everywhere having my guts for garters!) :) Maybe it will be better next time you're there? Abster xx

Ellie said...

Eek, poor you, you should definitely let him know he's a sad sod - in the nicest possible way of course. ;-)

Steg said...

"he's pressing up against me, has a bit of a case of octopus-hands and is offering to snort cocaine from my bosom"

- What a silver-tongued charmer!

Mephitis said...

Thanks all.

How could I possibly resist, eh, Steg? :D

Unfortunately M thumping him wouldn't be good for community relations, Abs, however tempting. :D And I don't think he actually realised I was a damsel in distress at the time, (Mr Unobservant).

It was very yukky, Ellie. It wasn't my best new year by any stretch of the elastic.

I think next time, (should there be a next time), he'll get some severe ego-puncturing. Pretending to laugh along was not a good move on my part, and not what I'd usually do in that situation either. Darn it.