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It's been a very good week for me, in terms of doing things and mood. I feel like I'm probably acting like a normal person instead of being this slug of depression.

It may be the Spring weather, so I'm a little put-out about the colder day today and the alleged snowfall that is supposed to be coming tomorrow. But I feel jolly good, even so. I have successfully painted the kitchen and the garden is well on its way to being prettified and productive.

I feel very hopeful that the PND has gone at long last. My predisposition for PND is one in a long list of reasons I think we shouldn't have any more children. M and I are agreed on this. It's not a new decision, it's just one that I think about when someone I know gets pregnant, for example. (As a neighbour has announced a couple of days ago). I quite enjoyed being pregnant, or at least I did the first time round, and it's a bit of a milestone to think I'll never experience that again*, and now T is interested in using a potty, my baby is growing up. It's a tiny bit sad and a tiny bit liberating.

The potty is proving a small trial to me already, in that S insists on "showing T how to use it". Or is it just that's she's too darned time-management efficient to be bothered going up the stairs? Fortunately she's keeping it to the occasional sneaky wee - a poo will get her throttled! The novelty should wear off ... and if she does it again, she's disposing of the waste herself. That should put paid to the problem, I suspect.

I brought Gran over for the weekend, and we talked about her breaking in carthorses. On one occasion, a young horse was pulling the harrow when a car went by and startled him. He bolted with harrow and all, my gran running madly after him. She finally caught up with him in the farmyard to find he'd cut himself and the harrow was banged up. Gran waited in tears for hours so she could explain what had happened to the boss, but he was very kind about it, fortunately.

She also talked about how she was bullied in school. The March twins may be dead by now, but their petty cruelties and bullying is still a clear memory to her. A very popular girl who was very good at sport, called Nina, once came to her rescue and frightened them off.

I love listening to my Gran talk about the past. I can sort of picture her as she was, and she's able to convey atmosphere really well. It's interesting hearing the way she sees things and how she sees herself. She has always seemed so formidable and I'm enjoying understanding more about her, discovering her really.


*Or at least shouldn't, if contraception doing its thing properly and nothing dramatic happens.